03.07.2008

It's 100 days since you left.
(Uncle got the date wrongly. =( Thank goodness I remembered.)
There's not a single day where you weren't in my thoughts, be it terrified or reminiscence.
Sometimes, some things I did made me think of you.
I'm sorry, but up till today, I still can't get over what had happened.
I still didn't dare to step in to your room, unless there's really a need for me to.
I went in to your room the other day to ask uncle about some stuffs, and as I turned over, that sight just flashed through my mind immediately.
I was a lil terrified.
I almost cried, not because I'm terrified. But because I thought of you.
When I learnt about the news of the death of the two national servicemen last month, I thought of you.
I came home from Jurong Point on Monday and took that lift.
I thought of you immediately.
I went Bugis on Wednesday and walked across that path.
I thought of you, again.
It was second brother's wedding that day.
You brought relatives, siblings and I to Bugis.
As we were about to return home, you asked if we want ice-cream.
We nodded, and you treated us to it. $7. I remember.
It was just nice for the seven of us young ones. Including you.
We asked if you would like to have one, too.
You didn't want it.
So we headed over to that ice-cream seller to get our ice-cream.
Yes, it's that path. I walked past it just that day.
And I looked towards that place where you parked the car.
Tears almost flowed.
Five days. It's barely five days. And you're gone.
But I believe you left happily.
Because you hanged on till brother's wedding.
And the previous Sunday, it was the match where Liverpool played Manchester United, your favourite club. And Man United won 3-0.
In addition, I believe you must've catched the international match before you went to bed. England lost 1-0 to France. That was your final sight of football.
I was first exposed to football by you when I was five or six years old. Remember?
(I still remember those football shorts that you bought for brothers and I.
I remember myself wearing the green colour ones.)
But it was only until 2003 that I was finally attracted to football.
Attracted to your favourite club, Manchester United's arch-rival, Liverpool.
Life is so fragile.
I couldn't believe that you left us so suddenly.
I kept praying that you'd be alright, thinking that there's still a glimmer of hope.
No, I'm not silly.
All I want was for someone whom I was once closest to, to be alright.

I miss you. Terribly.

人，总是在失去后才懂得珍惜。
That's life.

I've learnt to start cherishing. It ain't too late, I hope.
You've always worried about grandma.
But don't worry okay.
Because you know I'll take really good care of her.
Put your trust in me alright.

Labels: 26/03/2008, Reminiscence